Confessions of a Newly-Turned 18 Year Old

I feel like there's this huge misconception about turning 18 that sets some invisible standard up for us kids to grapple with, thanks to Hollywood, the inter-web, and those still-older-than-you kids at school.
You know what I'm talking about: that mysterious 'air of sophistication' that comes the morning of your 18th Birthday (or any birthday?). It's easy to spot these students because they're probably wearing some sort of "It's my 18th Birthday" identification. They seem older (obviously) and just quite possibly capable to finally shape-up if they so choose. They just seem like they have it all figured out, with the world at their fingertips, ready to go out and get what they want. Surely they're not scared with what the future holds, not the least unsure of what they're going to experience in the next few months after Graduation. They know exactly how they're celebrating, and exactly who they're celebrating with. And it will be amazing.
This image of the wonderful transition into adulthood, however, is a figment of our imaginations. It's true. Because let's be honest, we are still children. If you don't believe me, and you think that I am one of those students mentioned above, keep reading, and hopefully you will understand why it's just not true.

Confessions of a Newly-Turned 18 Year Old

• I still sleep with a stuffed animal and blankie. Because I can. Whoever said that you can be too old to sleep with these much needed items should double-check that. 
• I'm going to a college in town for a few reasons. One of which is that I want to stay near my mommy. 
• I have no idea what I'm doing with the rest of my life.
• I cry every time I watch Monsters Inc and Tangled.  
• I still laugh when the ketchup bottle farts.
• I take naps. With my blankie.
• I choose shampoo based on its smell
• I will go to great lengths to avoid social interaction when it's not absolutely necessary
• Anticipating phone calls makes me nervous
• I love socks and Goldfish crackers

So how did I celebrate my birthday anyway? I had three friends come over to my house, and we hung out, played Nintendo, ate food, and colored. This morning I got breakfast at Waffle House and bought some fabric (thanks mommy:)) Nothing crazy, but it was what I wanted to do. And I'm thankful I got to do anything at all.

No matter how I celebrate my birthday, life has taught me many things that have shaped me into who I am today. Some are more impacting than others but all are important nonetheless. One of the most important, is that if you act like you know what you're doing, no matter what it is, be it dancing, presenting, dressing, or just being, everyone will believe that you know what you're doing. I have learned this from multiple occasions. Because, I am not a good dancer. But if you are moving close enough to the actual beat of the music, and you just pretend your body's supposed to be moving like that, then nobody will question it. Relating to that, is the fact that nobody is ever paying as much attention to you as you think. We spend more time wondering about this than anyone actually spends thinking about us. So relax. Take time to know yourself. This has been a great teaching-tool for me, because trust me when I say that crowds make me anxious. So it's probably a good idea that I don't go to every school function, and surround myself with people that I don't really like anyway. I would not enjoy it. I do make sure to go to some though, because what the heck? Life moves fast.

Also, I get grumpy if I wait too long to eat. Don't worry about eating that cupcake, or the fact that that one guy took exactly 27 minutes to text you back but you responded in only 13. Because cupcakes are blessings and boys are clueless. Be honest with yourself. And be honest with those you care about. It's easier to talk about the things you want and expect before getting emotionally involved in things, than after a huge misunderstanding has already exploded. Don't settle or lower your standards for anything. Anything. You do you. Do what you need to do, and don't make yourself uncomfortable for anyone. You have no obligation to anyone to do something you're not ready for. Don't rush yourself; growth, healing, love, and hair all take time. So embrace the journey. Don't try hiding yourself from your friends. They love you for a reason. Go ahead and buy the shoes- they'll be gone if you don't and you can always return them. Learn how to say no. Eyebrow gaps are way more important than thigh gaps. Be kind- you never know what someone else is going through. Be willing to forgive and make-up, because it takes a lot more effort to not be friends with someone, then to just get over yourself. And last, but definitely most important: Trust God. He loves you and has a perfect plan for your life. So, don't spend an excessive amount of time thinking about it like I sometimes do.

I'M 18 GUYS!! So far it feels great. :)) Not really different, but fun in an adventure-is-coming kind of way. Learning to take it one step at a time, and glad you get to be there with me. <3

  

The Power of Prayer

Throughout my life, the topics I've learned about in church never really seemed relevant to each other (if that makes any sense). Like, obviously they're relevant because it's God's Word and it's truth, but from week to week they never really felt connected to me. The last several months though, one idea has been very prominent no matter what the lesson may be, and it's one that has stuck with me in a way that many other ideas don't: the power of prayer. Sounds like a pretty basic idea, right? I mean, how complicated could it be?

Well, it's not that prayer is complicated. For me, it's that prayer has always been a splotchy area; I pray before meals (most of the time) and before bed (if I don't fall asleep in the middle of them), but I've never been good at remembering to pray throughout my day, just one little piece at a time. It doesn't have to be much more than that- and I can pray for myself or anyone around me.

The idea of the power of prayer has come up again and again lately in church. Stories have been told, and you can hear these stories from many people, about how prayer was a miracle for them; that someone was healed, or spoken to by God in a dream, or just given hope to keep living. And every time I heard about the power of prayer, I thought to myself, "Man, I wonder what my prayers could do for someone" , you know? Like how could someone I may or may not know be impacted because I said a prayer for them? How have I been healed or strengthened due to someone else praying for me? This was such a humbling thought.

So, I started praying more. This doesn't mean I've been praying better. But I have been remembering the verse in Philippians 4:6 that says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." Present your requests to God. God wants to hear what's on our hearts, He wants to hear our requests, He wants us to give Him our concerns and fears and dreams. I've never been great with this, because I figured that I didn't need to pray for certain things because God already knows my heart. But that doesn't mean He doesn't want me to ask for whatever I need. And that's what I've been trying to do, not just for myself but for people around me as well. Sometimes, I just ask Him, "God please help me get through this class without complaining; help me shine Your light." That's all it takes, and that's what He wants. Every time we reach to Him, through prayer, His presence is that much stronger in our hearts. I've also been trying to pray for certain people right as they pop into my mind.

Romans 12:12 is an encouraging reminder when it feels our prayers are going to waste: "[Love is] joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer," I often feel that my prayers aren't being heard because I don't see any change or difference in those I'm praying for. But through this little journey, I've seen a change in my own heart. See, the more you pray for others, put them before yourself, the less concerned you are with all the 'needs' of your life. It reminds you that everyone struggles...and that just because someone messed up doesn't mean they're a bad person or unworthy of the effort of your prayer. It's humbling to see healing in my own heart can occur by praying for someone else. It just changes your whole attitude.  


It's hard for me to watch friends falling away from what they seemed to believe for so long. And in my heart, I really want to fix these situations. But I can't. That is God's job. When I want to try and rebuild those bridges or mend those friendships, I have to remember that it's all in God's timing. When I know someone's hurting, and that they need encouragement, but I can't get to them, I can pray. That has probably been my biggest revelation in this: it doesn't really matter what I can't do for someone, as long as I do what I can with all the love in my heart. I can only pray for certain people I know, but I know that if I do this with love, and genuine effort, that's all God needs to see. I know my job is to show others love, so if prayer is my only means of doing that, then I'm good to go.

I have to remind myself not to grow weary in this habit of prayer (2 Corinthians 8:11-12, 9:6-7, and Galatians 6:9), because eventually it will produce a result. And I have to remember that there is no stupid, irrelevant, unimportant prayer to God. Colossians 4:2 tells us to devote ourselves to prayer.

Remember that life is not about being perfect. It's about our heart and our efforts. You don't have to sit and pray for two straight hours every day. But little snippets here and there really can make a big difference in your heart and attitude. There really is amazing power in prayer.

"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." ~1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Make-Up Favorites

So, I'm not what you'd call a make-up guru, but I do know what works for me. I only get fancy for special occasions, but the products I use everyday have definitely made me a faithful user for those brands.

Here are some of my favorites when it comes to beauty products:

~Covergirl LashBlast Fusion Mascara

 

This mascara does an amazing job of making your lashes look long and full at the same time. I've been using it for more than four years and it's great. It rarely clumps. You can find it at Target or Walmart for about $8. 

~Lip Crayon

Reveling Colorburst Matte Balm in the color Sultry is fantastic. It's new to me, bringing a different look without going far out of my comfort zone. It really is a matte balm, giving the look of lipstick without the 'sticky-ness'. I apply it once in the morning before school and the color only barely fades through the day. The bottoms twists to bring up the stick as you use it.

~Foundation

The Rimmel London Stay Matte Liquid Mousse Foundation is so true to its name. This foundation is the only one I've tried so far that really does keep the shine away all day. I use the Soft Beige color, which is just a smidge dark now, though perfect in summer. The only reason I know that is because if you don't rub the foundation in well it does streak. But a little goes a long way!! It's thicker than most, so it spreads well.

~Eyeliner and Shadow

 

L'oreal Liquid Eyeliner (with a brush tip, not felt tip) is great. I'm not eyeliner savvy, but this goes on very easily and isn't splotchy like many others. It also comes off easily for those mornings when it may get all over your face ;) . I also love love love Maybelline's Color Tattoo Eyeshadow in Bad to the Bronze. This little container lasts forever, and the color is subtle but beautiful. I apply it with a shadow brush. 

~Eyebrow Pencil

This is the Maybelline's Define-A-Brow pencil in Light Brown. All you do is fill in the needed areas on your brows and comb them (if you want to) with the handy little brush. This shade is perfect for my dark eyebrows because it blends in and looks natural.